Narcissists, Violence and Abuse
The narcissist defends himself against abuse by becoming the abuser. Early childhood abuse is fended off by resorting to grandiose fantasies of omnipotence, omniscience, brilliance, unmitigated success and eternal love.

The narcissist feels unique, unprecedented, indescribably special. His actions are of cosmic significance. As a result, he feels entitled to special treatment, even if such treatment is incommensurate with his talents, skills, or actual achievements.

The narcissist is incapable of loving, or even empathizing with other people. To him, they are instruments in the compulsive pursuit of gratification, adulation, attention and affirmation ("narcissistic supply"). He does not fathom the human experience because his emotions are thoroughly repressed and he is obsessed with obtaining his "drug" (the aforementioned supply).

The narcissist has conflicting needs. On the one hand, he derives his sense of self-worth and the regulation of his self-esteem from others. On the other hand, he needs to feel superior and contemptuous towards the very sources of his sustenance. Hence his erratic unpredictability, callousness, cruelty and dangerous capriciousness.

The narcissist inflicts pain and suffering on his nearest and dearest: spouse, children, colleagues, employer, friends. While rarely physically violent, he is a master of mental torture and psychological nightmares.

I have written extensively about narcissistic behaviour, its roots, dynamics and sad outcomes. The issues of bullying, domestic abuse, violence and narcissism are inseparable.

quite impressed by ur approach n convincing psychological explanations of such dilemma,even at such young age(if u really r 18!!!...hahahaha)
i think u better give up the idea of becoming PM n strive hard 4 a carrer in psychiatry;since i have seen ur aptitude n potential quite inclined towards helping out ppl out of their misery....
n as far as treatment of women by men is concerned.....i dont think that we always should look up 2 religion 4 guidance!!! bcoz to me ethics r not just related 2 religions but to human beings themselves....if moral values r just embedded in religion so that would mean that every atheist(mostly russians n chinese)r liars,dishonest,war mongers n they dont treat women n children well;but we know thats not the case.....religion has limitations n we must not stretch it too hard 2 make it up something by ourselves...
we just should remember that we(humans)r born 2 love n take care of just not ourselves but also ppl around us(ragardless of gender,religion n colour)bcoz thats what makes ur different from animals....bcoz if we dont do so;we r no more better than animals....regards..

=== Original Message ===>>>>

Narcissists, Violence and Abuse
The narcissist defends himself against abuse by becoming the abuser. Early childhood abuse is fended off by resorting to grandiose fantasies of omnipotence, omniscience, brilliance, unmitigated success and eternal love.

The narcissist feels unique, unprecedented, indescribably special. His actions are of cosmic significance. As a result, he feels entitled to special treatment, even if such treatment is incommensurate with his talents, skills, or actual achievements.

The narcissist is incapable of loving, or even empathizing with other people. To him, they are instruments in the compulsive pursuit of gratification, adulation, attention and affirmation ("narcissistic supply"). He does not fathom the human experience because his emotions are thoroughly repressed and he is obsessed with obtaining his "drug" (the aforementioned supply).

The narcissist has conflicting needs. On the one hand, he derives his sense of self-worth and the regulation of his self-esteem from others. On the other hand, he needs to feel superior and contemptuous towards the very sources of his sustenance. Hence his erratic unpredictability, callousness, cruelty and dangerous capriciousness.

The narcissist inflicts pain and suffering on his nearest and dearest: spouse, children, colleagues, employer, friends. While rarely physically violent, he is a master of mental torture and psychological nightmares.

I have written extensively about narcissistic behaviour, its roots, dynamics and sad outcomes. The issues of bullying, domestic abuse, violence and narcissism are inseparable.

Well dear fellow all women have great power to feel pain of there person and I think now this era women are really suffering many types of pain if she goes out of her home, she suffer unusual behavior of man and Pakistan law gives many right to women but who use those? Nobody every second man beat their wife without any reason.
Well I am not agree with you that we should not look up to our religion first of all In Islam women gets right and safety and which pain are suffering now a women because we forget our religion and forget to get guidance from there… Raped ration is getting high day by day because we forget the fear of ALLAH and where you heard that china is look after their women in better way now world is suffering many problems and the reason is that we forget this that what our religion said to us and who taught you that you born for love and take care my dear your religion, If Islam would not come than you will not able to judge the life its a bad fatality that we forget the our book and Allah. And I can not say that we are not better than animals because at least we have sense for up our voice and those have Allah’s gaudiness they never enter the term of animal ... Yes its true that mostly person are looking animal but if they start to looks animal who go towards them and try to stop them...? If we get this sense those women, children’s and elders made for respect that time we enter of great term of human being and when we able to realize this when we will do read our religion in correct way.
I hope you got me... Okay May ALLAH Bless You!
=== Original Message ===>>>>

quite impressed by ur approach n convincing psychological explanations of such dilemma,even at such young age(if u really r 18!!!...hahahaha)
i think u better give up the idea of becoming PM n strive hard 4 a carrer in psychiatry;since i have seen ur aptitude n potential quite inclined towards helping out ppl out of their misery....
n as far as treatment of women by men is concerned.....i dont think that we always should look up 2 religion 4 guidance!!! bcoz to me ethics r not just related 2 religions but to human beings themselves....if moral values r just embedded in religion so that would mean that every atheist(mostly russians n chinese)r liars,dishonest,war mongers n they dont treat women n children well;but we know thats not the case.....religion has limitations n we must not stretch it too hard 2 make it up something by ourselves...
we just should remember that we(humans)r born 2 love n take care of just not ourselves but also ppl around us(ragardless of gender,religion n colour)bcoz thats what makes ur different from animals....bcoz if we dont do so;we r no more better than animals....regards..

=== Original Message ===>>>>

Narcissists, Violence and Abuse
The narcissist defends himself against abuse by becoming the abuser. Early childhood abuse is fended off by resorting to grandiose fantasies of omnipotence, omniscience, brilliance, unmitigated success and eternal love.

The narcissist feels unique, unprecedented, indescribably special. His actions are of cosmic significance. As a result, he feels entitled to special treatment, even if such treatment is incommensurate with his talents, skills, or actual achievements.

The narcissist is incapable of loving, or even empathizing with other people. To him, they are instruments in the compulsive pursuit of gratification, adulation, attention and affirmation ("narcissistic supply"). He does not fathom the human experience because his emotions are thoroughly repressed and he is obsessed with obtaining his "drug" (the aforementioned supply).

The narcissist has conflicting needs. On the one hand, he derives his sense of self-worth and the regulation of his self-esteem from others. On the other hand, he needs to feel superior and contemptuous towards the very sources of his sustenance. Hence his erratic unpredictability, callousness, cruelty and dangerous capriciousness.

The narcissist inflicts pain and suffering on his nearest and dearest: spouse, children, colleagues, employer, friends. While rarely physically violent, he is a master of mental torture and psychological nightmares.

I have written extensively about narcissistic behaviour, its roots, dynamics and sad outcomes. The issues of bullying, domestic abuse, violence and narcissism are inseparable.

Everyone is beautiful. I'm not making a trite and shallow statement. I believe this. Everyone ... EVERYONE ... has something that makes them beautiful. I'm not talking about inner beauty, I mean physical beauty. I, personally, think everyone should love at least one thing about their own bodies. I think it's healthy to do so.

I know that the common consensus is that one should focus on the soul of a person rather than their looks. I don't care. We all have something about our physical selves that we love. The depth or color of one's eyes, the color and texture of one's hair, crinkly smile lines ... grace of movement. It goes on and on.

Oh, and the media images. You might appreciate your own curvy, non-sixpack tummy, the callouses on your feet from dancing or running, the wrinkles on your face ... are you getting me here?

So tell me, what is at least one thing you find beautiful about your own body? And tell me what you never found beautiful about yourself before that you've grown to love over time.

Hi everyone! We had a presentation about it in class (I was a grad student:)). Based in right of women,we were trying to gain equal rights for women by education, policy change, laws defending against domestic violence, all kinds of great stuff. and we should make awarness of women rights in the mind of un aware womans. and as you see in Pakistan the education is runing the reach of poor woman parents.

We say that the world has undergone a lot of developments over the last century. I certainly agree that it has developed in terms of science and technology, but at the same time I ask myself whether development is a synonym of extremism. Surely not! Yet in today's so-called modern world we are all living under the constant fear of extremism. Fear of World War III, fear of dictatorship, fear of suppression, and fear of being denied the right of being ourselves.

I ask myself why the news of death, murder, rape, Karo Kari, dowry deaths, bride burning, suicide bombings, massacres and all such issues never cease to haunt the daily newspapers. I ask myself why we fight over differences in colour, race, religion, status and class. I ask myself why we humans look at one another with eyes filled with hatred and enmity.

I look around and feel that I have an answer. It is mostly because we are divided amongst ourselves, we have closed our minds or should I say we have lost our minds. Above all ... I think it is because we all are stubborn and egoistic.

I have seen people arguing, sometimes two people with wrong ideas and perspectives are arguing unnecessarily, sometimes one with the right perspective and one with the wrong are arguing, but has any one of us ever seen two people with the right perspective arguing. Well, I haven't. So why don't we give up all the unnecessary pride and ego, admit our mistakes like strong people and find a way out.

Is there a way out? I think I can suggest one.

I feel that there is one fact that we must accept... the averseness of the weak against the strong, the foolish against the wise and the evil against the virtuous is a natural state of affairs, which cannot be eliminated. But it certainly can be improved. I think that if we apply three basic laws to our lives there is hope for tomorrow.

Firstly, the Law of Universal Love. We must learn to appreciate the positive elements of one another and neglect the negative. We must not be divided amongst ourselves. It is my personal understanding that the world should be divided into two parties, the virtuous and the evil.

Secondly, the Law of Tolerance and Acceptability. We must accept one another's strengths and help remove the weaknesses. All other differences are pointless because in truth, colour, race, religion, status and class of another person does not affect our lives as individuals, so why not live and let live?

Lastly, the Law of Self-Regulation. We must check ourselves and try and correct ourselves rather than wait for others to point out our ignorance towards the law. Well, laws are made for our own security and to maintain peace. Is it that we do not want to be secure, or is it that we are not peace loving?

I hope that majority says no to both the above questions and wishes to join the party of the virtuous. If so, why not strengthen goodness and virtue and work towards a common goal i.e. to rise above differences of colour, race, religion, status and class and focuson humanity!

i assume that u didn,t understand my arguements,well let me elaborate once agian....all i meant by my reference 2 Russians n Chinese was that if only ppl relating 2 some religion(Islam,Judaism or Christianity)r pious n well mannered then every atheist is a criminal,liar n dishonest but thats not the case bcoz u,ll find good n bad ppl everywhere regardless of religion,colour,gender or nationality...
BTW,can u point out a single muslim country where women have more rights n privileges as they have in Pakistan....take Saudi Arabia 4 example,where women can,t even drive,where they can,t vote,they dont have citizen rights n can,t even run their own business!....u want that kind of system?
n about Karo Kari n honour killings;if u read paper n tune into different dialogues on TV about it,u,ll realize that these evil customs can,t be abolished by imposing Islam bcoz they r simply related 2 fanatacism,unawareness n lack of education(sometimes this disgusting ritual is also practised in educated families)so u can,t mix it with religion....we have 2 educate ppl(particularly women)about their basic right n also their civic duties(bcoz if they dont fulfil their civic duties,they can,t be granted their rights!)
i respect every woman not bcoz i was born in a muslim family or i was told so but bcoz i simply feel that there must be some modesty n decency while addressing 2 a woman..
i am still a firm believer that religion has limitations n we must not go beyond its threshold...like what can religion contribute n 2 what extent 2 make Pakistan a developed n economicaly stable country?...i think not much....bcoz religion is a persoanl matter not a state matter...democracy is always secular n once we have democracy(in other words secularism),we,ll have every problem solved....

=== Original Message ===>>>>

Well dear fellow all women have great power to feel pain of there person and I think now this era women are really suffering many types of pain if she goes out of her home, she suffer unusual behavior of man and Pakistan law gives many right to women but who use those? Nobody every second man beat their wife without any reason.
Well I am not agree with you that we should not look up to our religion first of all In Islam women gets right and safety and which pain are suffering now a women because we forget our religion and forget to get guidance from there… Raped ration is getting high day by day because we forget the fear of ALLAH and where you heard that china is look after their women in better way now world is suffering many problems and the reason is that we forget this that what our religion said to us and who taught you that you born for love and take care my dear your religion, If Islam would not come than you will not able to judge the life its a bad fatality that we forget the our book and Allah. And I can not say that we are not better than animals because at least we have sense for up our voice and those have Allah’s gaudiness they never enter the term of animal ... Yes its true that mostly person are looking animal but if they start to looks animal who go towards them and try to stop them...? If we get this sense those women, children’s and elders made for respect that time we enter of great term of human being and when we able to realize this when we will do read our religion in correct way.
I hope you got me... Okay May ALLAH Bless You!
=== Original Message ===>>>>

quite impressed by ur approach n convincing psychological explanations of such dilemma,even at such young age(if u really r 18!!!...hahahaha)
i think u better give up the idea of becoming PM n strive hard 4 a carrer in psychiatry;since i have seen ur aptitude n potential quite inclined towards helping out ppl out of their misery....
n as far as treatment of women by men is concerned.....i dont think that we always should look up 2 religion 4 guidance!!! bcoz to me ethics r not just related 2 religions but to human beings themselves....if moral values r just embedded in religion so that would mean that every atheist(mostly russians n chinese)r liars,dishonest,war mongers n they dont treat women n children well;but we know thats not the case.....religion has limitations n we must not stretch it too hard 2 make it up something by ourselves...
we just should remember that we(humans)r born 2 love n take care of just not ourselves but also ppl around us(ragardless of gender,religion n colour)bcoz thats what makes ur different from animals....bcoz if we dont do so;we r no more better than animals....regards..

=== Original Message ===>>>>

Narcissists, Violence and Abuse
The narcissist defends himself against abuse by becoming the abuser. Early childhood abuse is fended off by resorting to grandiose fantasies of omnipotence, omniscience, brilliance, unmitigated success and eternal love.

The narcissist feels unique, unprecedented, indescribably special. His actions are of cosmic significance. As a result, he feel

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.

Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.
Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us.

Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole in your fence.

Might be I could not get you anyways thanks for telling me about that issue in detail.
=== Original Message ===>>>>

i assume that u didn,t understand my arguements,well let me elaborate once agian....all i meant by my reference 2 Russians n Chinese was that if only ppl relating 2 some religion(Islam,Judaism or Christianity)r pious n well mannered then every atheist is a criminal,liar n dishonest but thats not the case bcoz u,ll find good n bad ppl everywhere regardless of religion,colour,gender or nationality...
BTW,can u point out a single muslim country where women have more rights n privileges as they have in Pakistan....take Saudi Arabia 4 example,where women can,t even drive,where they can,t vote,they dont have citizen rights n can,t even run their own business!....u want that kind of system?
n about Karo Kari n honour killings;if u read paper n tune into different dialogues on TV about it,u,ll realize that these evil customs can,t be abolished by imposing Islam bcoz they r simply related 2 fanatacism,unawareness n lack of education(sometimes this disgusting ritual is also practised in educated families)so u can,t mix it with religion....we have 2 educate ppl(particularly women)about their basic right n also their civic duties(bcoz if they dont fulfil their civic duties,they can,t be granted their rights!)
i respect every woman not bcoz i was born in a muslim family or i was told so but bcoz i simply feel that there must be some modesty n decency while addressing 2 a woman..
i am still a firm believer that religion has limitations n we must not go beyond its threshold...like what can religion contribute n 2 what extent 2 make Pakistan a developed n economicaly stable country?...i think not much....bcoz religion is a persoanl matter not a state matter...democracy is always secular n once we have democracy(in other words secularism),we,ll have every problem solved....

=== Original Message ===>>>>

Narcissists, Violence and Abuse
The narcissist defends himself against abuse by becoming the abuser. Early childhood abuse is fended off by resorting to grandiose fantasies of omnipotence, omniscience, brilliance, unmitigated success and eternal love.

The narcissist feels unique, unprecedented, indescribably special. His actions are of cosmic significance. As a result, he feel

It is a matter of great concern that now a days people spend lavishly to support the bad tradition of dowry. Many girls from the lower strat of society remain unmarried because of this practice. I would like to bring to the attention of the people of our society that taking dowry is unethical: so, stop playing with lives and say no to this practice.